Wednesday, 29 January 2014

HONOR......and..... FORGIVENESS

HONOR

Things happen, life moves on, you can look back at all of that and get blinded by it, so focused on the rear view mirror that you lose sight on whats right in front of you, you lose site on reality. Things change in life, people move on, things may turn around, does not mean your feelings, your love for someone is. It will never be gone if you take the time to take all of their final words to heart, EVERY WORD, and let them know that you are honoring them, they will know without a doubt that they are in your heart. Love is all about honor, respect, trust, commitment, if you keep them to your heart, then the bond will always be there. Its important to do whats right and move on when you have to, but does not mean you need to lose the bonds that you have made. 

FORGIVENESS

In life, people that we care so much for may do things that we hate, really not like, to the point that you lose trust and hope in them. Cheating, Stealing,.... it makes us rethink what we truly want, need, what really matters, and why you even with that person. There will be times in your life that you will look back on it and see it once again, may make you happy that you gone, or it could make you feel sad and make you see things differently. Make you see something special in someone that you couldn't see before because of all that they were doing before. Something that makes you regret leaving them. You may never have the chance to get them back, but there is always a time to take the time to talk to them, to let them see that you still care, that you want to be there for them, and that you forgive them. Even if you can not talk to them, you can imagine and spend just one more time with them, let yourself forgive what they done.

I had that moment these past 2 days.... someone was not treating me so well for a long time way back in the past, but looking back on it now, I saw something really really special in the person. Things have changed now and there may not be a way for me and the person to have what we had, but I now feel ... I can not explain it but I am happy for taking the time to talk to her and to forgive her for everything, even if I couldn't talk to her any more.

No matter how much someone has hurt you in the past, no matter what has happened, always take the time to forgive and let them know that you care and had a wonderful time with them and everything. Things may change and people split, its all part of life, but if you hold that past in you, you may hurt your future in one way or another, holding a grudge for so long may make the next similar situation worse. Even if its over, take the time to forgive, even if you feel that its too late.

Friday, 24 January 2014

ALL The Poems / Song Lyrics I Have Written So Far

Every single song lyrics and poems that I have written so far. Enjoy.

All These Tears 

In my life, I never had no body

loneliness, no one ever around me

Gone was my heart, locked up tight

But when I met you, my soul burns bright


My life used to be all dark and hateful

But now its all caring and beautiful


This feeling in me, I never felt before

The sight, the smell, I can't imagine more

This feeling, thought I would never...

All these tears, my curse gone forever


You saw something in me, I thought was gone

emotions pouring out, my heart turned on

Used to think that love was a dream

but with you, It is all I need


Never thought I would feel like this

Time with you I never want to miss


This feeling in me, I never felt before

The sight, the smell, I can't imagine more

This feeling, thought I would never...

All these tears, my curse gone forever


When everything breaking down on me

You know how to make me feel free

And when I feel sad lonely

All I need is you with me


This feeling in me, I never felt before

The sight, the smell, I can't imagine more

This feeling, thought I would never...

All these tears, my curse gone forever


The Faces Of Fear

Walking around outside my house

Looking, watching, as quiet as a mouse

Seeking the unknown, looking for something

Looking, Seeing, Watching, Observing

Every sight of life filling me with fear

Unknown faces drawing near

Hides in my house, feeling dirty

Thinking I was safe, isolated and free

When i looked up, I saw myself

A reflection of me, in fear of life itself

Isolated, scared of many faces

Many colors, styles, looks and races

So much history behind every one

Have never cared about none

Seeing my reflection, I shed a tear

Finally I understand, my vision is cleared

I hated others, without knowing why

How can one judge someone, without even saying hi ( meaning without even talking to them )


We Here For You

In life, there will be a time

A moment of pain, that crosses that line

That line in your soul that you thought nothing can get through

Heats you up, burns you down, more than you knew

Broken,shattered, messed up, confusion

Causes you to be alone, isolation 

Don't give up, you not the only one

In time, it will all be gone

We are here for you, take away that knife

Take my hand, we will give you life

We will bury you with kindness

We will drown you in niceness

We will cut deep into your soul

Filling in that deep whole

They will no longer break ( you ) 

Your heart will awake

We here for you

Together, we will break through


Why Am I Trying.... 

So much effort, working, trying

Pushing and pressing, but nothing

I have skills and the mindset to be

But they continue to reject, and kick me

I have what it takes to become something

Sacrificing my time for this, wanting, needing

Years of trying, years of  " NO "

Having worked so hard, but yet they don't know

Worked so hard, yet always being kicked

Why am I trying, if they almost caused me to get sick

I keep my head up in these dark times, keep hoping

That when one door closes, another one opens


Schools and Bullying

Bullying all around us, abuse, hate, suffering 

No light in site, only work, dances and singing

The voices of change from those who don't give it

The hands of hope reaching out, but don't mean it 

Lies, distrust, no where to turn to

Everyone scared, not knowing what to do

Those teaching to stand against, are the same ones who bring others down

When we do as they teach, we the ones who are rundown

How can we speak of change to the selfish minds

We express the need, but their minds are blind

The world calls for change, each and everyone 

Yet they don't understand anyone

Something must be done , a way to change their mind

Turn their minds from heartless, to selfless

Show them what they are doing to their students, our kids

Have them be tested to see who they care more, people, or themselves ( no more of telling us that our kids need to be tested ( like by a doctor and so on ) , they should be telling us that they have something for our kids ) 

We all understand bullying, we all know whats going on

It is them who needs to put something in place, to give the students, our kids, something to feel strong

To feel as though they are needed, wanted, accepted, and feel special 

No more isolated groups, we need something extra ( meaning no more little group meetings for students, we need something more than this ) 

Something where the bullies can truly be free, truly have their voices heard

To bond together with other and really make a difference in their schools

To feel free in their schools, and also protect it ( the school ) 

To truly bring change to not just one school, but many 

We may never see something like this happen, may never be

Because of the selfish powers that be, that teach it, but don't be it 

Forever Will Be

Down and gone, my heart dead

Feeling stabbed, soul broken, bled

Trapped in a once safe space

This dark place once full of grace

Looking for a sign, struggling to see

Feeling Forever trapped, forever will be


Wall cracks, the light signs through

Feeling something different, it grew

A sign of hope, feeling in me burning

Feeling so different, my life turning

Finally feeling free to be me

Forever free, forever will be


Out of the hole, out of the darkness

Awaken is my soul, no longer feeling heartless

Seeing the world outside, confusing, complicated

Feeling awakened, turning frustrated

Out of the hole, yet darkness all I can see

Forever lost, forever will be


Pain Can Not Stop Us

The walls breaking down

By the cries so loud

The strength of out might

Shall end this pointless fight


Hate, now clear and clean

Suffer, no longer seen

No longer down and thus

Pain, can not stop us


Battles long and heavy

Overcame by always staying steady

Victory cries heard around the land

We can finally live our lives so grand


Hate, now clear and clean

Suffer, no longer seen

No longer down and thus

Pain, can not stop us


Can't Hurt Me No Longer

Hearing the voices of hate

Now Begging me, your too late 

No Forgiveness no longer

Never going to listen any more


You speak, Can't hear you

You beg, Can't hear you

You Scream, Can't hear you

Can't hurt me no longer


The pain I once felt

By the whips of the belt

The many times of forgiveness 

Walk away from your ignorance 


You speak, Can't hear you

You beg, Can't hear you

You Scream, Can't hear you

Cant hurt me no longer


Hurt no longer

Trust no longer

Pain no longer

You no longer


You speak, Can't hear you

You beg, Can't hear you

You Scream, Can't hear you

Cant hurt me no longer


Struggling Never More

Dark times, overcame

Life brighter than a flame 

Suffered through dark times

Finally see the bright signs 


Cries I once shed 

Tears once spread

Out and over forever

Struggling never more



Got out of the darkness

Away from the heartless

Now free to be me

Only if you could see


Cries I once shed 

Tears once spread

Out and over forever

Struggling never more


Darkness, vanished

Pain, no longer

Hate, Gone

I, forever stronger


Cries I once shed 

Tears once spread

Out and over forever

Struggling never more 


Moment For The Ages

Moment like these, unheard of

Victories, success, over, above

Moments like this rarely come along

This moment can never be wrong


The moment for the ages

The time for new beginnings

The struggles and stages 

This is a moment for the ages 


Life Forever changing

A lifetime of trailblazing 

Fighting to reach the top 

Focused, determined, nonstop


The moment for the ages

The time for new beginnings

The struggles and stages 

This is a moment for the ages 


Made it to the level 

Finally got rid of my devil

Now its time for me to be

To reach the stars, far as I can see


The moment for the ages

The time for new beginnings

The struggles and stages 

This is a moment for the ages


Heart And Mind

The heart of love

The mind above

One without the other

Causes one to suffer

The Thoughts and feelings

Brings together everything


Heart and mind of one

May weight hell of a ton

Hearts and minds of many

Can create life for any 


Feelings from actions

Thoughts from reaction

They are bonded together

Will Always and forever

Bring them together, shall create life

Create life, together we shall survive


Heart and mind of one

May weight hell of a ton

Hearts and minds of many

Can create life for any


The Sound Forever Fearing

Walking up from my slumber

From a sound like thunder 

No sounds of dripping was heard

Not a single flash appeared

Curious of the sound

This room I step out 



My life forever haunting

The Sound, forever fearing


Hearing knocking at my door

At such a time feared me more

Opening the door to a black figure

Some body, yet disfigured

A light clears the dark

Looking at a creepy smirk 



My life forever haunting

The Sound, forever fearing



He hands me a bloody letter

Once that I clearly remembered

It was a note I gave

A note to forgive

Then voice wishpered a word

That caused fear so much more


My life forever haunting

The Sound, forever fearing


I slammed the door 

Locked every entrance more and more

No sign of light shining 

Only sound of knocks making

Isolation I forever be

The letter I forever read


My life forever haunting

The Sound, forever fearing....


The sounds continued hammering

In my soul burning and hurting

Causing crazy insane pain

Growing marks of madness in my brain

No longer a sign of hope in me

No sign of life that i can see


My life forever haunting

The Sound, forever fearing....


Truth and Lies Collide


Truth and lies all over

Good guys and bad everywhere

The world forever confused

The people being used


When truth and lies Collide

Create a world of fear

People forever lost, distrust

Happiness vanish like dust


People being used all over

Wanting to feel safe, but will never

With all the scams, all the lies

Every person you see, even those giving advise



The world losing trust, with all the lies

When truth and lies Collide

The world will never feel alive

When truth and lies Collide


Song For The People

People stand up, your time is now

People in the way, let bring the plow

No one stops our movement

They have no life, they are the stupid


This is a song for the people, a voice of hope

A force to change things, not just cope

A song of faith, a vision of better

World will never suffer again, ever


The Voices of the people, getting louder

The sounds of life, the combined power

Combined strength, people come together

To make this land better forever



This is a song for the people, a voice of hope

A force to change things, not just cope

A song of faith, a vision of better

World will never suffer again, ever


Combine with hands

Come together again

Life we live together

Your life will never drain


This is a song for the people, a voice of hope

A force to change things, not just cope

A song of faith, a vision of better

World will never suffer again, ever



The people have purpose

The people have power

The people together stronger

The people better forever


Must Fight On

The Vision may be lost, but not gone

The time is now, to bring a new dawn

The mistake I once made, shall not consume me

The struggles goes on, but i shall be free


Must fight on

To once again see

Must not quit

For the people to be

Must fight on

For the people to see

Must not quit

To bring a future of peace


The suffering continues, but not for long

We have heart, Our will is strong

We shall change this with might

With soul, our minds combined


Must fight on

To once again see

Must not quit

For the people to be

Must fight on

For the people to see

Must not quit

To bring a future of peace


To bring change

One must act

To give hope

One must attract

To be free

We must fight

To have sight

We must bring the light



Must fight on

To once again see

Must not quit

For the people to be

Must fight on

For the people to see

Must not quit

To bring a future of peace


My Dream Forever Lost

A goal unfulfilled, a vision vanished

My heart torn, my mind shattered

Stolen is my life, gone is my goal

Hope no longer, trapped in my hole


My dreams lost, my soul suffering

This life I live, forever burning

The side I chose, a heavy cost

My dream I once had, Forever lost


Walking alone, no one sees

Isolation, this feeling ( of ) unease

Life once mine, shall never be

Happiness lost, no longer free


My dreams lost, my soul suffering

This life I live, forever burning

The side I chose, a heavy cost

My dream I once had, Forever lost


All was mine, now is lost

Forever in dark, fear it has brought

The future now in dark hands

Spreading sadness and fear, through out the lands



Our dreams lost, my soul suffering

This life We live, forever burning

The side We chose, a heavy cost

Our dreams We once had, Forever lost


Cries For A Hero

Suffering figures cover this land

Suffering burning up like the desert sands

The bruised hands reaching up for light

Too dark to see, Too painful to fight



Fallow or suffer, suffer or die

The choices for the ignored cries

The cries for a hero 

To set them free, must get out and go



Wishpers in the dark, prayers for a sign 

A sign of hope , to feel a glimpse of life

Their cries for help causing more hurt

The more they unheard, the more they lose hope


Follow or suffer, suffer or die 

The choices for the ignored cries 

The cries for a hero 

To set them free, must get out and go


A beam of light, brightens the darkness

The evil sinners, ash to ashes

The hand of truth, hope comes

The hero has finally came, vanish the wicked ones



Suffer or fallow, die or suffer

The rule no longer exists here

Hero of light, vanish the dark

Even the dark lies a spark


Turning Point

A change in the times, unexpected events

Turn this life in different paths

For the better, for the worst 

Times that one may wish was reversed

Confused of all the pain one brings

Hurt from all the stabs, all the lies 

Stabbed in the back, the unseen actions 

From those who were once friends

Lies causes war between various fronts 

A time where one must choose a side at once 

All sides have their ups and downs 

But choosing the simpler path, may lead one to drown

Choosing a path without meaning, without thinking

Will haunt one's future, suffering, sinking

If one chooses to fallow reason and understanding

May result in one having, but losing 

The choice to fallow your heart 

May in time result falling apart

However, to have what you hold dear

One must sacrifice, without no fear 

This path may be long and tough

May make one think enough is enough

But the reward after the hard and long struggle 

Will bring about a life so beautiful

For at the end, lies the path you have been looking for

The suffering, no longer, no more

Each and every path has their ups and downs

But without feeling, without thought, your life may drown

But with mind, with feeling, one will live

Whether with love , or the reason to survive


The Path To Living

I got a little something to tell yea about living

The paths to take, the life worth taking

The roads all have a bright side to them

But all those paths have consequences in em

The path one takes may look special to you

But the truth may be sad, depressing and " blue "

All paths so mixed up, so complicated

The path you thought was great may change to hatred

Following others may make you feel needed

But is it something that you always wanted

Darkness all around, fakes, robbers, haters, and bullies

No where is true, all covered up in lies

No one can make you choose a path, no one controls your life

No one can make you take that step with a knife

Its your life, live it the way you know how to

Take your steps in life, they can say what they like but you know what to do

Nothing is true, everything is permitted

No path is just, you want something you go get it .... your way


Life Moves... 

Those days when its time to get out on your own

That day where you moving away from all you known

To live on your own, a new start

The time makes you feel like a restart

Your life starting new, your past over there

They may be far, but will always be here ( heart )

Life moves, Time flies

It might be hard, but nothing to make one cry

Keep living, keep making your life rise high

Be strong, live well, keep yourself feeling fine

No matter where you go, never forget all that got you there

Life moves, never forget to stop to breath the air

Whether you living hard, relaxed, fast, or whatever

Always take time to think of all that got you to where you are


Signs of Hope

Life is full of hate, life may make you drown

Life can be so dark, and bring you down

Things will make you lose hope

Things may bring you down a slope

Life can not keep everyone down for long

Things that hurt can also make them strong

The ones who suffer, may hurt a lot

But deep inside, lies something one may never thought

The power of change lies in everyone

But those who suffer have more power more than anyone

Life may look bad, but look closer

You will find a path to turn your life over


World So Corporate

Life is turning more corporate, more business

From the need to take care of one another, to take caring of what we got

Manipulation, scams, all aimed at money making

Saying they care, but showing off, bragging

Showing how much they make, and not what they do

Is this real, or are they trying to screw

To give false hope for change, when taking our money

They give false sense of a better future, but continue to steal, bully

The signs are their in various companies, whether people want to see it or not

We want to stop bullying, but we need your money for more " jump shots "

Sports, dances, things for those who are living

But what about the other side, what about those suffering

When will money be less important than the people

Why do they steal from us even though they tell us its illegal

When will they see that they are wrong

When will all of us truly get along

Will the suffering forever be that

Will they wait until they see them fall flat

When will be the day this all changes for the better

What will make things right, so this never happens again, ever


My Life Is With You

My life never felt complete until the moment we met

The moment we were face to face for the first time, I will never forget 

With you my life felt like it has just begun 

Everything you do and say is like nothing anyone has ever done

My life is filled with life every time we together

I feel so blessed and lucky, me and you forever 

I just want to do what it takes to make you smile

Every day, every second, no one else can ever have your style

Seeing you happy with me makes me feel like no other

The life I have with you I know I can never have with another

You are the only one that I need, to make you happy is all I want to do

And I will forever love you more and more, more than you ever knew 

My life can only be found when I am with you 

I am forever yours, and that's the truth :)


The Silent Cries For A Better Life

The truth of life is hidden, yet seen

Its seeing the sights that yet unseen

Its a sing of hope, covered in lies

Others may show, but yet only causing more lies

They cover up what others already know

Giving us lights, music, like they think life is one big game show

Where the hurt are only given knowledge that they not alone

But yet you continue to hear voices that are yet unknown

Voices and sounds that seem to be ignored

The cries for something to make them feel like they never felt before

Something that will truly be something

But as long as they continue to ignore, all we will see is the same thing

We need to create something ourselves, cause they don't seem to want to

The cries for a better life, we must make them come true


What Leader Will You Be

When the world looks broken and finished

There is those who are working are on getting things changed

Those who truly care, those who stand up to those liars

Those who feel they helping, but really are spreading the fires

The fires spreading far and wide, and it only getting bigger

The world is crying out for a bigger brighter future

Will your voice be one that clears these fires or expand it

Will you make people commit or submit

Will you get people to commit to creating a better change

Or will you be the one who forces and makes them submit to your rage

The world needs leaders, need to get better

But how will you make it happen, care or scare


The Trap Deep Within

Feel trapped in a hole, a hole I can not get out of

I look up at the top, but too dark above

There is no light side in this dark trap I am in 

I am blinded for such a long time, I do not know how long it has been

I need support, need a way out

But no one can help me, no matter how much i shout

The only way out is for me to choose 

Other to end my life, or change my mood

This is so wrong, I feel so mad

But this dark trap I am in, I can not fight back

But if I do not choose it, then others may have to face death 

If i choose to end a life, I would be free

But would lose a piece of myself, deep within me

What choice will I choose, and will I be able to live with myself

This dark trap I am in, may end in suffering to one self 

The path I take, I must stay strong 



Life goes on, but for how long... 


Rise To The Top 

The top of the ladder, the top of the tower

The chance to become, to have the power

The climb up top, seems impossible to bear

One day I wish, I need, I just got to get there 

The path unclear, but the goal is in sight 

I must prepare, get my mind right 

Look at what needs to be done, get those opportunities

I must find people to support me, the support of the community

I need to keep myself focused, keep myself motivated

The task if a long and rough one, but it will never get me frustrated

I going to get what I want out of life, its now my time to shine

The top of that tower is mine, time for me to get in the front of that line

I have suffered so long, but this time is now mine 

Life has brought me down, but I am now beyond fine 

I will give back to those who are the bottom, who feel like its too much

I will give anyone a shot at me, YOU WANT SOME? ... then lets get in touch :)


The Hidden.... The Unseen 

We are the few who most do never see

We watch from the shadows, looking at what be

What be done to this land of ours, this one full of injustice

Watching your every moves, all of your cowardice

We understand, we know whats true

We see what has happened, all cause of you

We have watched you for some time, all you have done

We are ready to take you down, the quest to stop the hate has begun

We will stop your harsh actions to the people, in any way we can

We will bring piece to this once glorious land

You will see this land turned around, a land without harassment

We will bring about a new life for all, the way it is ment ( to be )

You have once forced us to believe that the only choice we had was to be submitted

But nothing is true, everything is permitted

 ( meaning nothing is just, people can choose freely what to believe :) )


Looking out my window...

Looking out my window, looking at the stars up in the night sky

Thinking to myself, what will become of me, how and why 

Why does others seem to get their time to become stars 

What makes them special, where are their scars 

I have pushed and have not gotten anywhere

I just wish I could just climb to the top, just be there 

Just be where I feel I deserve to be

To be the one who people want help from, who reach out to me 

NO, I have suffered for so long

I have been through so much, have never done any wrong

I have always done what needed to be done, for others to feel happy

To feel free, to feel needed 

I have done so much, and will continue to do more

If others look down at me, i don't care, I have done so much more than i ever thought i would ever do before. 

I am a star, to my friends, families, and the community 

Together, we are stronger than all, UNITY :)


Test After Test....

Life has hit me with another test

This is not a written one, its more of a quest

A quest that reminds me of the past

All that I Been through, All those questions I have asked

I get answer after answer, but still not enough

I need to know the reason for all of this tough stuff

Like will I ever be free, to take on my own paths

Will I ever grab my dreams, or will they only be that ( dreams )

Will i see the light of day, in this darkness I am suffering in

Will I ever be out of here, please tell me when

To create a future that I can call my own

To feel as though I have reached my thrown

To be on top looking down

Giving others hope, not to bow down

Will I ever get that chance, to change the place

Or will i simply be known as a no one, never to be traced

So many questions yet answered, so many paths yet taken

Will I find my place in the world, or will I forever be forsaken


This face will never turn again

This face has always turned back

Back to forgiveness, for all the mistakes of the past

The hardships, the hate, the lies, will they end

I wish to believe you, hope your words are not pretend

I turned my focus back to you, no matters how much you hurt me

I always wanted this what we have, to always and forever be

I believed in you so much, but fell into that trap

Once more you have hit me down, my face you have slapped

Abused, hurt, turned me away once more

Should have listened to my gut, lies before,

You have lied to me time and time again

You have lied and abused my mind, and deep in my brain

But I am done, through, finished, over,

Will never turn my head to you, you will never see this face ever

Me and you, forever gone,

If you think I ever going to forgive you again, you are so wrong.

I will turn my head to a new life, that I will create

A life that you would have begged to be apart of it.


The Light In The Darkness

Stuck in a dark place, too dark to see

Dark figures with other dark figures, but yet they don't see me

All the dark figures seem to just walk pass

Ignoring me, when I get close, they move away fast

Alone, Isolated, in a world full of life

If only i can find a way, a gun or a knife

A way to get out of this isolation

A way to leave this world, to a brand new destination

After some time, a light at the top of a hill

Something that makes me feel something that i thought only a knife can fill

Being in such a dark place for so long, suffering deep within

And now seeing that light in the dark, this feeling never bin

This feeling never bin in my life ever

And now I feel it, thanks to that light over there

I walk towards the light, reaching the unknown light

Darkness fading, The light getting much more bright

I reach the light, i no longer feel depressed

I not feel something I thought i would never feel, blessed

No matter how hard life is, there is always a silver lining

A light that will turn your mind from slashing, to laughing :)


One of those days.....

Its just one of those days, where no one seems to see me

Just one of those times, where I am scared to be

One of those steps, that looks so hard to get over

One of those struggles, where I feel like a longer

Those times where I wish I can get there

One of those times where I just want things to be fair

Its just one of those days where I want to fight out

One of those times where i just want to scream out loud

One of those days where I just want to be

Be somewhere, Be someone, to just be ME .....


A Poem For All The Moms Out There 

moms are always there even if you feel they not

moms always care even if they tough

moms give, make, and create life

moms take care, raise and work to bring new life

moms always there, moms always care

some moms might not seem like it, but they always there

 to share, to give, never take,

to love, never hate,

to bring life, never death,

to bring new life and to always love :)


Help Those In Need...

Life may be easy for some, people may be happy...

But there are those who are not, those who are unseen

The ones who hide, the ones who are scared

Those who feel alone, and unneeded

Those who been hurt, heart and soul torn

Those who beg and plea for NO MORE!!

Those who need to be, those who want to be needed

Those who keep reaching out to something, will you be it?

The leader to guide them, the one who gives

To give something to give others the chance to live

To create change, by giving others the chance to be true leaders

To change the mind of the hurt, and change their lives for the better

Life is full of hurt, but also light

Will you be apart of the good fight :)


No One... 

no one speaks, but are talking

no one sees, but always looking

no one gives, but always hands out

no one hears, but always responding

no one needs, but asks for stuff

no one wants, but always gets

no one understands, or choose to ignore

all they want to do, is more and more

they act not for others, but for themselves

they look down at others, who they say are below their level

they must be stopped, they must be taught

the truth must be heard, this war must be fought

they say they doing it for us, but clearly a lie

they act like this is their life, but this is mine ( yours :) )

they try to make things better, by doing what they know is wrong,

they choose to ignore us, like we do not truly belong

stealing, selfish acts, ignoring, are these actions supposed to bring peace?

we must make life better, but not become what we see ( bullying and stealing and being selfish and so on )


Will Walk No Longer... 


Have walked on the cold painful grounds of this dark unforgiving land where i lay for so long, feeling only hurt

Dark figures around me, pointing to me, judging me, using me just so they can feel a sence of comfort

The pain of being lonely, been walking this path so long, doing anything i can to stop the pain

This is too hard to handle, too hard to bare, so hard to be me when so many judging who i am

Looking back at all of that, and seeing where i am now, i shed a tear

Knowing that i have come so far, and now i am living

I have made things in my life, better than what others thought of me

I will walk no longer.... because i am just too high up :)



Take What Really Matters To You

Sometimes in life, you have to take what you want and not what you need, sometimes you need to take the bad, but grab the good. Sometimes you need to take the hate, but hold on to the love. Sometimes its not whats right, but whats best for you. Sometimes a path may seem hard, but it is the ability to adapt, and build yourself in order to overcome it. People may not agree or accepted your choices, but in the end, it is your life and whatever makes you feel happy that comes first, your feelings and your health before anything else. Some people may never understand or never know why you would do what you do, that is because they have been so fixed in what they have been doing that they can no longer open their eyes to other people's actions or know why other people do what they do. I had that experience when I felt like I was so focused on getting a job, so much that I focused on that and stopped thinking of why I was really trying so hard to get it, almost like that thought was slowly going away until I noticed that I was getting sick from it. Know what you really want out of life, take the time to really think about it till your feeling, and your mind are both " feeling " the same thing, till you convince your mind what your heart is saying, or the other way around. If your mind is so focused on one thing, and your heart is on another, then what do you think will happen once you get what you so focused on? You may think that your heart will be open to get what it wants, but how much did you have to pressure your mind to focus on that other thing? Its like focusing so much on money, that once you actually get it, your mind may be too attached to money, to the rich life, that you may lose that peaceful, caring side of yourself when it comes to getting what your heart wants, such as a soul mate. You may think or feel that you will be all nice and caring, but if you have pressured only your mind into one thing, your mind will continue to be focused on it because it will be like a natural thing to your mind that you may not notice what your heart is trying to tell it. You may take more time on money and all that, and at the same time feel like your soul mate is happy with you ignoring or worse, as long as you are providing for her or him. You may also start to wonder, and probably make fun of why people with less seem to be happy with their " dirty " life ( meaning " poor ", working for less ). Don't go for something until you have convinced your mind and your heart that it is what you truly want out of life. Whatever choice you make, things will come together and things will work out one way or another. There are always losses when it comes to choosing a path, but in time you will see things becoming what you have always thought and felt it would be, one way or another.

Thursday, 16 January 2014

My Thoughts On Employment Issues ( my final blog article about this )

I just want to write my thoughts one more time on this, a way to get all my thoughts out and explaining about how things seem to be getting worse and worse in the world when it comes to employment and getting a job.

Having been working and building up more and more trying my best to get a job in my field, having studied and focusing all my time, taking time away from almost everything, even away from my games ( I admit I am a pretty big gamer lol you will see why I mentioned that ), doing anything and everything to get a job, having gotten interview after interview each and every week ( pretty much ) for the past 3 years.... 3 YEARS ( well the very first week I was still depressed like my story shown so more like 2 years but that's beside the point ), and only getting 2 volunteer positions for like 4 months each, not even a full year, and one of those spots I only got that chance from a family friend who was planning on starting a web design company, creating sites for people, but only got a few clients and the company wasn't working out since they did not have enough time and so on ( they told me to focus on the web design part of it, which I did ). I have been improving my interview skills each and every interview I went to, got trainers to train me on certain stuff, interview skills, and some computer skills. I tried harder and harder, leaving so much out just to focus on this, that I first thought that if I was to do something else, I would lose my chance at it, and later on ( like a week or 2 ago ), on one day, I actually started to talk around the house like every person I see was a potential job, like every person was a chance for me to express my skills and so on, and I knew it was happening but couldn't stop for one full day. If someone had to go through all of that and still not get anywhere, what is really wrong here?

I have made 2 blog articles talking about " one door closes, another one opens ". I say that because in the time that we live with all these problems with getting a job and so on, it could make anyone to rethink about what really matters. If one has to press on for years in order to just get accepted for any job position, there something really wrong, and not with the job seeker trying their hardest to just be accepted.

I have thought of an idea for this, have the government come up with a law that states that when a company reaches a certain level of success, they must take in a certain amount of less experienced / new grads. A really successful company could take that and promote that they will train and work with their entry level workers ( as a past blog post of mine mentioned ), that will bring in people wiling to work for less, knowing that they have a place there, that will build up their company as well as the community. If however the company does not follow it, then they will be sharing a certain percentage of their earnings to the government, that will be used to help other companies to build up, so that those companies can be in charge of hiring entry level people, making it so that the successful companies will have to make a choice of losing money from the government to support other companies and the community, or supporting the community themselves, while keeping their earnings.

There are a lot of people out there who are suffering from this, and are turning to looking for " lesser " salary jobs. As a past article of mine mentioned, why would someone with years of experience in one field can not get a job, while someone with a one day forklift certificate can get one in within a month or 2? What is the real problem, job seekers needing experience, or companies wanting too much from new grads? How can companies say that they need people with some work experience, if they know they have worked in college and achieved their goal of graduating and having the opportunity to work in their field, but can't because of their ( companies ) needs?

Sunday, 12 January 2014

Why Am I Trying.... ( poem )

So much effort, working, trying

Pushing and pressing, but nothing

I have skills and the mindset to be

But they continue to reject, and kick me

I have what it takes to become something

Sacrificing my time for this, wanting, needing

Years of trying, years of  " NO "

Having worked so hard, but yet they don't know

Worked so hard, yet always being kicked

Why am I trying, if they almost caused me to get sick

I keep my head up in these dark times, keep hoping

That when one door closes, another one opens


Monday, 6 January 2014

One Door Closes, Another Door Opens.....

In life, there are times where you will feel really down and hate how things are done, such as having to get a job but no matter how hard you try, they continue to say that you not qualified and so on. There will be times where you keep hitting roadblock after roadblock time and time again. Things may bring you down so much that you start to feel like you will not be able to get what you truly want out of life, but if you keep your hopes up just long enough, something will pop up. It may not be what you planned it to be, but it has bin something you have really wanted out of life. It may not have went down the way you wanted it to, but it is something it is your chance to have what you always wanted.

Don't let things get to you too much, or it could make you real sick, like it almost done to me with my job search, pressuring myself and pushing myself to get a job in my field real hard for so long, to the point that I started talking like a business man around the house for one day, even though I knew it was going on, and couldn't stop ( no joke, really felt like a real mental issue but good thing it only lasted one day, and also had a few other things like thoughts that worried me but was not that serious ). You should never force yourself and suffer to get something, if you breaking down to get it, you need to take the time to look around and find other options to get what you really want out of life. Money isn't everything, you should not make it be the reason you breath if you are not at that level yet or that spot yet ( like worrying about getting money if you have not gotten your first job position yet ), focus on what you truly want out of life before anything else. When one door closes, others will open, and you never know if it may lead you back to what you wanted, or something better, or at least something that you can live with and that will not break you down.

Saturday, 4 January 2014

The Faces Of Fear ( poem )

Walking around outside my house

Looking, watching, as quiet as a mouse

Seeking the unknown, looking for something

Looking, Seeing, Watching, Observing

Every sight of life filling me with fear

Unknown faces drawing near

Hides in my house, feeling dirty

Thinking I was safe, isolated and free

When i looked up, I saw myself

A reflection of me, in fear of life itself

Isolated, scared of many faces

Many colors, styles, looks and races

So much history behind every one

Have never cared about none

Seeing my reflection, I shed a tear

Finally I understand, my vision is cleared

I hated others, without knowing why

How can one judge someone, without even saying hi ( meaning without even talking to them )



" You Can't Be With That Person Cause That Person Is ..... ( color ) "

Because one color hurts others, that means everyone of that color hurts everyone. Because one person don't care, that makes everyone of that color doesn't care. Because one does something, that mean everyone of them does that........ ( sarcastic )

I have heard stories and knew people who been through these type of people, not allowed to be friends with someone cause of their color. In history, everyone has done something, everyone has done something really bad, so does that mean that we should be scared of everyone but our own kind? Should we just say stuff like how someone abused someone so anyone who was that color or look is abusive? Sure it is a scary sight that someone been abused so it may make one feel scared about it, but you can't let it take over your life and your future children life and so on. You can't make it effect you mentally, or you will not only be messing up your head / life but others as well.

Its time to move on. Their are evil people in the world, but it does not mean everyone is. When will we see that no matter what color we are, we are all human? How can we continue to think that if someone is a shade of a certain color, that we immediately know who they are inside and out?